My Chemical Bandfic
by Scarlet di Veleno
Summary: IT'S BANDFIC TIME! HAHAHAHA, it's a surprise, read if you wish. :D


**Hello my lovelies. You probably won't see this for a while because the blasted fucking internet is down. So I'm here with my best friend in first period tech lab as I write this. I really have no clue as to what I should write about. **

**WAIT.**

**I GOT IT!**

**IT'S A MYCHEMICAL BANDFIC!**

**WHOOP!**

**HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**LET'S HAVE SOME FUN!**

**Well, are you ready, Ray?**

**_YEAH!  
><em>How 'bout you, Frank?**

_**Oh, all night baby.**_

**How 'bout you, Mikey?**

_**Fuckin' rrrrrrrready!**_

**Well, I think I'm alright. **

**1,2,3, GO!**

Chapter One ~ Fuck Like A Kennedy.

It's Moiiikay's P.O.V.!

We're on tour yet again. Jeez. Anyway, I'm FUCKIN' REAAAADY! We're going to London, England. The place where I traveled 14 years ago, fell in love, and had a child with one of the most beautiful women ever. Frank has a kid in England too. I think we're going to meet them.

TODAY.

FUCK.

SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT I FUCKING FORGOT.

*FACEPALM.* 

I hear the tour bus come to a screeching halt. The driver slams on the brakes.

"WHO THE FUCK IS DRIVING? TELL THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO TAKE THE DRIVING TEST AGAIN!" I look towards the front.

Frank.

I knew it.

"YOU LITTLE MIDGET FUCKER! WHO THE FUCK LET YOU DRIVE?"

Frank pointed at Gerard. "GEE LET ME!"

"GERARD! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?"

He gave his vampire smile. "I dunno, just thought it would be fun watching a Christmas elf drive a fucking gigantic tour bus."

I rolled my eyes and got off the bus, walked toward the front door of a dark blue Victorian, and knocked on the door.

Evangeline answered. She looked at me with those green eyes.

SHIT.

"Can I see her?" I asked.

"Sure, Mikey." She was so calm but I knew she wanted to probably beat the shit out of me.

"Look, I know you're mad at me-"

"No, I'm not. I'm really happy to see you and I'm glad you want to see your daughter."

She led me up the stairs and down a hallway to a navy blue door with a big poster hanging on it. It read: WE ARE THE KIDS YOUR PARENTS WARNED YOU ABOUT in a familiar font. The Black Parade font, to be exact. We heard music blasting from underneath the doorway.

"_THEY SAID ALL TEENAGERS SCARE THE LIVING SHIT OUTTA ME, THEY COULD CARE LESS AS LONG AS SOMEONE'LL BLEED! SO DARKEN YOUR CLOTHES OR STRIKE A VIOLENT POSE, MAYBE THEY'LL LEAVE YOU ALONE, BUT NOT ME!"_

I looked at Evangeline. "I take it she's a Killjoy?"

"You bet. Guess who her favorite is?" She gave me a look.

"Fuck," I muttered. "So you mean to say my daughter has a crush on me?"

"No, no, just a strong admiration." She knocked on the door. "Logan! Open the door please!"

"Okay, Mother! Hold on!" she yelled through the door.

"Wow. That's some well-mannered kid," I remarked.

"Yeah, she behaves herself. But she's a true Killjoy."

A petite girl with long, jet-black hair wearing a gray blazer and black skinny jeans walked out of the room. Also wearing the "Mikey Fuckin' Way" shirt.

"Yeah, Mom. What do you need?" She had a slight British accent.

"I want you to meet your dad."

"SAY WHAT NOW?"

"I said, I'd like you to meet your dad."

"Where is he?"

"MICHAEL! COME HERE!"

I stepped out of the corridor.

"HOLY FUCK. . NONONONONONONONONONONONONO. MIKEY FUCKING WAY IS NOT MY FATHER. MIKEY FUCKING WAY IS NOT MY FATHER. ! HOLY FUCK HE IS. SHIT. SHIT. SHIT! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. FUCK!"

"Hi," I said.

She fainted.

"Oh, fuck."

She woke up five minutes later, on the couch in the living room. "Mom. I had the strangest dream. Mikey Way was my dad and he was here and I passed out and-" She looked at the couch across from her. "HOLY FUCK THE DREAM IS REAL." She looked at me. "Um… So you're my dad?"

"Yep," I smiled.

"FUCK," she spat. Her mother looked at her pointedly and said, "That's enough swearing for today."

"NO! MIKEY WAY IS MY DAD. I CANNOT POSSIBLY CALM DOWN. I NEED TO… I NEED TO… WAIT." She looked back at me. "C-can I… um… hang out with you guys?"

"Sure," I grinned.

"GAAAAAAAH… I'm hanging out with My Chemical Romance. Mikey Fucking Way is my dad. Mikey Fucking Way is my dad. Gerard Arthur Way is my uncle. Gerard Arthur Way is my uncle. The Sass Master is my uncle. I am related to two of the most attractive people to have ever stepped foot on earth."

"Two?" I asked.

"Yeah, aside from Brendon Urie, Ryan Ross, and Logan Lerman."

"Your name is Logan."

"I know. I know. Isn't that awesome? But really my name is Aria Logan Wintour… actually Way."

"Aria Way. I like that."

She grinned like the Cheshire cat. "Can we go now?"

"Yeah, sure. As long as your mom says it's fine."

"It's fine!" Evangeline called.

"YAY! THANKS MOM! LET'S GO MIKEY – I MEAN DAD! WAIT, CAN I CALL YOU MIKEY?"

"Yeah, sure you can. It's too late to call me dad anyways."

She frowned and smacked me on the shoulder. "No it isn't. There's still time."

"'How 'bout you, Moiiikay?'" she asked.

"'Fuckin' rrrrreaady!'" I yelled.

We went back out into the tour bus.

"Hey, guys. This is my daughter, Logan," I introduced her.

"Ummmmmm…. Hi," she answered shyly, hiding behind my back.

"Hey!" Frankie yelled from behind her.

"HOLY ," she yelped, jamming her elbow into the object… or person, behind her.

"OH FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK. DAMMIT THAT HURTS. FUCK. OW. MOTHERFUCKING SHIT. OW." Frank yelled.

She turned around. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" She looked at him. "Oh, hi Frank. You're smaller than I expected."

The tour bus erupted in laughter. Gerard came out of his bunk.

"HOLY SHIT IT'S GERARD. OH . NYAAAAH. GAHHHHHHHHOLY SHIT." And then she passed out.

"What just happened?" asked Frank.

"I really do not know," I said.

Gerard looked at her. "Fuck, no wonder. She's in the MCRmy."

"How can you tell, Gee?" Frank asked.

"'Cause, Sherlock, she has a Killjoy gun," he said. "And not just any gun," he looked at me, "the Kobra Kid gun."

Strapped to her belt loops was indeed the Kobra Kid gun. On her wrist was the Mousekat on a charm bracelet. Damn.

She woke up. "Whe-where am I?"

"HI!" Frank yelled.

"FUCK!" she yelled back. She came to her senses and said, "Oh, sorry, I'm afraid of little people."

Frank gave a "HMPH." And went back to his bunk.

"Where are we going next, Mikey?" she asked.

"Oh, we're gonna go pick up Frank's kid. She's your age. Her name's Rian," I said.

"RIAN?" she squeaked. "As in R-I-A-N?"

"Yep," said Ray.

"HOLY SHIT OH MY GEEZY. SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND. SHE'S GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN SHE FINDS OUT. Can I call her?" she said excitedly.

"NO!" Frank yelled from his bunk bed. "DON'T!"

"FINE!" she yelled back. "BUT DON'T BE SURPRISED WHEN SHE FINDS OUT THAT HER DAD IS BUTTERCUP FROM THE POWERPUFF GIRLS!"

The bus had been moving the whole duration of this conversation. Hey, that rhymed. Well sort of.

"TAKE THAT BACK!" Frank yelled.

"WE'RE HERE!" Gerard yelled back.

"Why is Frank so jumpy?" she whispered to me.

"He doesn't wanna mess this up. I don't either. Look, I'm sorry for running out on you. I know I'm a shitty dad. But I hope you won't hate me anymore," I answered.

"I don't hate you. And you're not a shitty dad. At least you sent child support and money for Christmas and my birthday," she mumbled.

"What did you buy with that money I sent you?" I asked.

"Food. Clothes. _Bullets, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, Life on the Murder Scene, The Black Parade, The Black Parade Is Dead, _and _Danger Days. _Oh, and the Kobra Kid gun," she replied.

We heard a scream. Logan looked out the window. "Yep. That's Rian."

A girl with black and blonde hair ran out of the house. Chasing Frank.

"This oughtta be fun," she said.

"BRO! OPEN THE DOOR!" Frank yelled.

Logan appeared at the door. "No."

Rian had caught up with Frank.

"Shit! Logan, help!" Frank whined.

"How much?" she asked deviously.

"FIFTY BUCKS!" he yelled.

"NOPE."

"TWO HUNDRED!"

"Sucker," she muttered. She opened the door and let Frank in, then stepped outside before Rian could enter.

Frank and I looked out the window. I pulled it up just a little so we could hear.

"Rian, Rian, sit down on the curb."

"Is-is he really my dad?" 

"Yeah, and Mikey's my dad."

"No sarcasm there."

"Nope. 100% true. Now you better calm the fuck down before they leave."

"Leave? Why?"

"Because you're scaring the fuck out of them. Stop being a fucking fangirl."

"I'm not a fangirl!"

"Um, yes, you are. You almost raped Frank Iero in your front yard."

"I DID NOT!"

"You did, and if you freak them out I will take them into your room."

"Can I keep them?"

"NO!"

"Then why are you taking them into my room?"

"I'm going to show them the video."

"NO! NOT THE VIDEO."

"Yes, _that _video."

"Oh. Okay. I'll calm down now."

"You better or I'll send you away to a stripper academy."

"OKAY I GET IT."

"YOU BETTER."

She walked back to the bus, Rian in tow.

The door opened.

"Okay," Logan sighed. "Frank, this is Rian. She's your daughter."

Frank cowered in the corner.

"FRANK ANTHONY THOMAS IERO JUNIOR, GET UP AND MEET YOUR KID," she yelled.

Frank shook his head. "No."

"DON'T MAKE ME READ A FRERARD!" 

"!"

"I WILL!"

She pulled out her phone and turned to me. "Mikey, you might wanna put some headphones."

I nodded and went to my bunk, passing Gerard, who was sitting on the couch and enjoying their conversation. He smirked. I shook my head.

I presumed Logan began to read, as Frank was writhing on the couch in agony and plugging his ears with his fingers. Everything was lost as soon as I turned up Blink-182 and plopped down on the couch next to Gerard. He was laughing his ass off.

Logan was yelling at the top of her lungs, so loud that I could hear it over I'm Not Okay (I Promise).

Gerard was gasping for air as he died of laughter.

Frank surrendered.

"THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!" she yelled.

Fast forward to our concert.

We let Logan and Rian come up on stage, but we never told the crowd who they really were. The fangirls would hurt them.

"Hey, everbody!" Gerard yelled. "For the next half of the show, I'd like two people to volunteer up on stage."

The crowd raised their hands.

"I LOVE YOU FRANK!" someone yelled.

"How 'bout you… and you," Gerard said, pointing at Logan and Rian, who were, consequently, in the front row.

They ran up on stage.

"So, what are your names?" Gerard asked, knowingly. He pointed the mic to my kid.

"I'm Logan," she grinned. "And this," she gestured to Frank's kid, "is Rian."

"Do you play any instruments?" he asked.

"Yep," she grinned. "I play guitar, and Rian plays drums."

"Sweet. Frank, do you have an extra guitar?"

He glared at Logan. "Yeah I do."

Logan ran around to Frank's side of the stage. She picked up an electric blue Fender and plugged it into the amp. She played the beginning of House of Wolves.

The crowd went crazy.

Rian pushed off our tour drummer off his seat and grabbed a pair of black drumsticks from her back pocket. She started drumming the beginning of Vampire Money.

The crowd screamed.

"WHAT'S YOUR NEXT SONG?" Logan yelled over the noise.

"Teenagers!" I yelled back.

Everyone got back into their place. Logan stood next to Frank, Rian sat behind the drums.

_They're gonna clean up your looks with all the lies in the books to make a citizen out of you, 'cause they sleep with a gun, and keep an eye on you, son, so they can watch all the things you do. Because the drugs never work, they gonna give you a smirk, 'cause they've got methods of keeping you clean, they're gonna rip up your heads, your aspirations to shreds, another cog in the murder machine. _

_They said all teenagers scare the living shit outta me, they could care less as long as someone'll bleed! So darken your clothes or strike a violent pose, maybe they'll leave you alone, but not me!_

We kept on playing. Our kids were pretty damn good.

Then the solo came on. We let Logan and Frank play it. They were fucking awesome.

Rian provided the beat for the next chorus.

_They said, all teenagers scare the living shit outta me, they could care less as long as someone'll bleed, so darken your clothes, or strike a violent pose, maybe they'll leave you alone, but not me! _

Gerard did the Gerard-Dance that made the fangirls go crazy.

We ended the song with a bang. The fireworks set off.

"Next song?" Rian yelled.

"YEAH!" Frank yelled back.

We played Vampire Money, and ended the whole show with flames.

Yes, flames.

_Fin. HOPE Y'ALL ENJOYED IT!_


End file.
